That Awkward Moment When You’re Breastfeeding and…

It’s national breastfeeding awareness month and I thought I’d do a little [humurous] post in it’s honor. Now, I’m absolutely 100% pro-nursing and without a doubt believe God made these bad boys to deliver awesome nourishment to our little ones. And I am, afterall, currently nursing my second daughter; BUT I’m not gonna lie, there are a lot of crazy, funny, and absolutely horrifically-awkward moments that come along with it. I always laugh about these things when they happen with the hubby but I thought, what the heck, I certainly can’t be the only momma who’s experienced moments like these. I’m just going to be so bold as to write about them. So, here’s to all my fellow mommas letting the milk down!

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Now, it’s taken me a while to be okay with nursing in public and I really try to avoid it if I can. A lot of moms give me a hard time about it and tell me I shouldn’t, but I can’t help it. So why you ask? Because like I said, moments like these tend to happen to me…a lot.

Rubbernecking
Really people? What’s with all the stares? I don’t get it. I’m covered and feeding my baby. Do us all a favor and stop starring. A few weeks ago, I had to nurse Eliana at the mall on a bench outside. I seriously should’ve counted how many stares I got. I bet it would’ve been at least 30-50 sets of piercing eyes within the time I fed her. How about I stare intensely at you while you eat? Instead, how about giving me a thumbs up for giving my baby what’s best, eh? Now that’d be a sight to see, “mall crowd gives nursing mommy thumbs up while they pass her by.” Do it!

Peek-a-Boob!
Yea that little circular gap at the top of my nursing cover, it’s not there for you to peek into to get a glimpse of my baby. It’s for ME to be able to see her and make sure I’m not feeding her eyeball or chin. I literally had a family member walk up to me while I was nursing and peek inside the gap to see the baby and went, “awwww!” Can you say awkward moment? Awwww to my goodies or the baby?! Back away from the peep hole people! It’s hard enough trying to keep her from flinging up the cover and showing you my ladies without you just walking up and peeping for yourself.

Piggly Wigglies
Now this has happened so many times to me. My daughters’ legs and feet will be poking out the side of the cover and someone will come up and play with her legs and feet. Um…really? It makes me want to do that to them next time they’re eating. I can just imagine myself crawling under the table and going, “oh how cute, gotta have me some of them piggly wigglies!” See how they like it…haha!

Gulp, slurp, gulp
Yea this didn’t happen with Emarosa but boy oh boy, miss Eliana is a loud eater. She slurps and gulps each time like she hasn’t eaten for days! One time I was nursing her at the hospital before her newborn screening test in a waiting room. I was covered and the nurse walks in to ask us some questions and all you hear is Elly going to town on these bad boys. The nurse just laughed and laughed. At least she followed up with the reassuring comment of, “Oh I’ve heard louder dear!” Whew, that makes me feel so much better…yea not.

Beep, beep!
Yea you’d think one would get away with nursing privately in ones own vehicle. Yea, not so much. Philip will park so far out in any parking lot to avoid the awkwardness of when someone is getting in or out of their car and I’m all sitting there like, “what’s up! Just feeding my baby here. Nice car by the way…” (which has happened a lot). And I kid you not, each time, someone has pulled up right next to us. Seriously people? We are in the middle lane, on the very last row of spots where no car or man has ever gone before and you’re going to park right next to us?! There are a million spots open all around. I’ve even had someone pull up next to us, their wife got out and he just sat there in the driver’s seat. I put a blanket over the window at that point…You know what, someone should invent a giant “Nursing Mother” car flag. Now I’d buy and hoist that baby with pride!

These are but a few hilarious run-ins I’ve experienced while nursing and I’m sure there are many more to come. I’ve learned to laugh them off and just try to focus on the beauty in breastfeeding my precious little one. This time is so fleeting and special; and before I know it, I’ll be weaning her off and she’ll be a rambunctious, eats-us-house-and-home toddler just like my Emmy is now. So until then, I’m going to enjoy every single loud, slurping feeding time and pray no more rubbernecking, peek-a-boobing, toe grabbing, personal space violators come my way anymore 😉

 

Breast is Best,
Erica

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